clothing

A strange occurrence happens to guys when they get married. Their old wardrobe and choice of clothes suddenly becomes very outdated and does not look good enough to wear anymore. When I was single I had my favorite shirts; I mean trusty, old shirts that I had in high school. I figured that even though it may not fit that well, if I just pushed up the sleeves or tucked it in just right no one would ever notice. I didn’t care that the grey shirt I had was once green a few years ago, it still look good with my jeans. I also didn’t care that someone could tell by the faded spot on the back pocket of my pants was where I put my wallet. Or, that maybe the bottom of most of my pants looked like they had just gone through a shredder because they looked a little worn and torn. All I cared about was that they looked liked they fit, and they were comfortable. I’ll admit, when I was single I sometimes didn’t care about the last time they were cleaned, they seemed to smell ok.

Then I started dating my wife. I paid a little closer attention to what I wore. I didn’t want her to think I was a total slob. I would put my clothes in the dryer with some fabric softener right before I put them on to make sure they smelled decent. Or I would attempt to get most of the wrinkles out by putting some heavy book on them or hanging them in the bathroom while I took a shower so the steam would get to them. I heard no complaints from her about my attire while we were dating. But I didn’t catch on to her master plan. On birthdays and holidays she would give me clothes as gifts. At the time I didn’t think anything of it, I mean they seem like appropriate gifts for people who are dating. I also knew I probably needed some additional clothing and choices besides the weekly same 5 shirt rotation.

But then we got married and I started to notice that some of my long time friends were disappearing. For every new shirt or pants I got, two of my old friends went missing. I didn’t even have the chance to say good bye. I thought she liked my style of clothing, but apparently I was wrong. All those gifts of clothing I was getting while we were dating were all part of her master plan to take over my closet. Now I really don’t mind getting new clothes, in fact since getting married I’ve notice I’ve gotten a lot my complements on my wardrobe. But, the problem sometimes occurs when I am picking out something to wear when we go out. I’ll put something on thinking its fine; she bought most of it for me anyways, only to get the comment “Are you going to wear that.” Apparently not, so I go and change into something else. Again, the same comment or “You know you have other shirts besides that one.” I don’t know how divas like Mariah Carey do it, I don’t like going through a bunch of wardrobe changes. So finally after many frustrating moments, my wife and I have come to the agreement, that if she doesn’t like what I have on in the first place, to just pick put what she wants me to change into. But sometimes I miss some of those old clothes; we had a good run together. Even though I probably looked like I never got out of the 80’s or 90’s.