Day 4 of the cruise.
You know the saying, now I've seen it all. Well on this
particular day I almost saw all of it, more on that later. This was our first
day going to a port; we were going to Cayman Island. We were excited that
morning and headed to the diner for breakfast. It was a calm breakfast as we
sat with other travelers. We discussed what we were doing that day. The
majority of us were going to swim with the sting rays, but there was an older
couple at the table. Seems that they did cruises frequently, and they had seen
most of the island. So the wife let her husband decide what they were going to
do. He excitedly said they were going to a car museum. The wife trying to hold back
her tears as she shook her head in disbelief that her husband for who knows how
many years, signed them up to go to a car museum while they were on a beautiful
island. The high point for him was that they had the Bat mobile. I admit part
of me wanted to go check it out. But, I think you have to married more than
three years to get away with something like that.
So off we went to start our adventure, we toured the island
shops for a while. It was very hot that day, so it was taking a lot out of me
walking around. So we decided to go to the area we were supposed to meet our
tour guide. But apparently we were getting a show with our tour. I was standing
there talking to my wife, when a look of shock came over her face. I turned
around to see what was behind me and I saw a guy standing there in his tighty
whites. It seems he thought the best place to change into his bathing suit was
right there in the middle of the island for everyone to see. I was just praying
please stop at the underwear, please. He did, but it still made me wonder where
this guy was from, that he thought that this was an ok thing to do. I sat next
to him on the bus ride, fearing that he might decide to change his close again;
I tried to keep space between us. Then he began to speak to his wife in some
strange language that I could not identify. I imaged he must come from some
foreign land where people just casually walk around in their underwear. Or he
was from California.
So we get to the boat dock to get on the boats that were
going to take us where the sting rays were. All this time I’m thinking, I’m
going to get stung in the chest like that alligator guy and die or I’m not
going to be able to swim away fast enough from something that might try to eat
me. To my surprise it was nothing like that. First of all, this was a big
tourist attraction; boats were everywhere, people all over the place splashing
and having a good time. The water was like looking through a window it was so
clear. It was only about 5 feet deep, so my fear of trying to swim away from
something was gone, I figured I could out run anything.
So we go in the water. Here’s a tip when swimming in the
ocean or gulf; keep your mouth shut. Did you know that ocean water had salt in
it? Duh. I jumped in like I would in my pool at home and got a big mouth full
of pure ocean salt water. I got done gaging just in time to see a sting ray the
size of Rhode Island swim by me. Our tour guide dives after this beast that
looked like it once battle Godzilla and brings it above water in his arms. He
began to pet it and kiss it, and I’m thinking this guy is nuts. Then he started
to tell us how friendly sting rays are and how their stinger is just this
little tiny stub on their tales and they only use it when they feel threatened.
So he asked who wanted to kiss her and get a massage from her. I’m thinking
this is no longer a family friendly tour. But I gave it a try. All you had to
do was hold your arms out in front of you and make a hoop, and they swim right
up to you. I planted a big kiss on that sting ray. I was shocked that my wife
also did as well. Then the tour guide placed the sting ray on your back and it
began to move around to give the best massages ever. I wanted to take one home
for a pet by the end of the trip, but my wife informed that it probably would
not survive very well in our pool.
Then we were off to do some snorkeling. That was fun, but the
ocean was rough. So most of the time when I had my face in the water and my
snorkel was pointing out, a big wave would come by splash on top of me, forcing
that wonderful salt water down my snorkel. It was like sticking a straw in
ocean and just sucking in and having it go straight down my throat. But, you
know the movie about the fish “Finding Nemo”. I found him. He swam right passed
me. I was a little disappointed that he wasn’t singing and I didn’t have
anything on me for him to autograph. It was cool to see all the sea life so
clearly. Then one of the other people on the boat was shocked when they turned
around and a sting ray was right there. It seemed one of them had followed us.
His name was Frisbee. It was a string ray that had lost his tail. What an
original name. I wonder if he got picked on by the other sting rays, poor guy.
We started to head back to shore. When one of the tour guides
just jumps off the boat and goes straight to the bottom of the ocean, he was
like Aqua-man. He came back up with this huge conch shell. He brings it on the
boat and rips the meat out of it and asked who wanted a piece. My wife gives me
this look like don’t you dare, but of course I did. It was good, it tasted like
sushi. He said it was an aphrodisiac. I grabbed a handful more. Hey, we are on
vacation, might as well make the most of it. My wife has always wanted a conch
shell for the house. So Aqua-man jumps off the boat and must have talked to
some of his fish friends, because within minutes he was coming back up with a
huge conch shell.
Here’s the thing about conch shells. They do not come out of
the ocean looking all shiny and pretty. They are covered in sea moss and dirt
and look like they come from the waste dump of the ocean. So the head tour
guide gave us instructions on how to clean it. Then he did one of the coolest
thing I ever seen. He opened the sails on the boat. It was awesome watching them
get caught up in the wind. He turned off the motor and we spent the rest of the
afternoon sailing to shore. It was a great ending to a fun day. Then we started
to walk back to the ship. We could not identify this horrible smell that seemed
to be following us around. Then the thought popped into my head that we were
carrying this thing that looked like it came out of someone’s septic tank. That
conch shell was putting off this extreme odor. My wife could not imagine having
this thing with us for the remainder of the cruise in our tiny cabin and plus
the drive home. So we just placed it on this empty chair we saw and left our
souvenir behind. Oh well it was still a great day. Plus we learned a few
things. One, sting rays are like dogs, they are man’s best friends. Two, I’ll
eat anything that comes out of something that smells and looks like it came
from Aqua-man’s bathroom. Find out what else I ate on the cruise at
www.gabbin-bout-grub.blogspot.com