Life is finally getting back to normal so I am able to get
back into the routine of doing these blogs, so back to the story of our 7 day
adventure on the sea...
It was the best of times; it was the worst of times. It was
the first full day on the boat. We woke up and conquered the breakfast buffet.
More on that at www.gabbin-bout-grub.blogspot.com.
After breakfast we put on our bathing suits and were off to find a quiet spot
by the pool. What were we thinking, thousands of people on the boat and we
thought we were going to find our own nice quiet spot... Yeah right. The first
placed we tried was the Serenity Deck. This was a so called area where kids
were not allowed. What we did not know that only meant little kids; the bigger
kids just drank a lot and made even more noise than the little kids did. So the
whole purpose of this area was for the parents not to drink and act like idiots
around their kids. After we sat there for about five minutes and discovered
that we were getting drunk of the other passengers breath we decided to find
another area.
We ventured off to the upper deck and found a nice spot
where there were very few people were sitting. After about 10 minutes more
people started to gather around us, no problem, don't make eye contact with
wild animals and they will leave you alone. My wife sat next to a nice young
couple, who actually seemed normal. I think they were happy to find other
civilians on the boat that could pass a sobriety test. They were far enough
away that I did not have to engage in the conversation too much, so I just read
the book I brought along. Then IT sat next to me. This old lady wearing a
bathing suit that did not cover enough and what was exposed gave up the fight against
gravity about 25 years ago. I just told myself over and over again. Don't make
eye contact, don't make eye contact. I could feel her lazy eye trying to stare
a whole in the back of head, hoping to start a conversation. But I was saved,
someone sat to the other side of her. So she twisted and flopped her skin the
opposite direction and began to chat with her victim. I was trying not to
listen in, but I couldn't resist. All she talked about was how many cruises she
had been on and where she had been. Then she announced that it was time for a
hot dog break. She asked her new friend if they would like one, he said no he
didn't want to spend the extra money. She laughed and said “Sweety it's all you
can eat, it's free.” I kind of chuckled as well and thought that I missed out
on an opportunity for someone to go get me a hotdog. Then she returned while
swallowing the hotdog whole. Out of nowhere another hot dog appeared, I had no
idea and did not want to know where she was hiding it. There was no way that
bathing suit had pockets. I just went back to my book and tried to put the
image out of my mind.
We then went to the other side of the boat. The sun was
moving and we were trying to find some shade. So we found another nice little
spot where no one was at. But again, people found their way toward us. I was
beginning to think that people would see us and say “Hey those two look like
they are trying to relax, let’s sit by them and annoy the heck out of them.”
First it was some older people who did not like the way the chairs were
situated and had to do an episode of HGTV and take a ½ an hour rearranging
them. When they finally got them the way they wanted, they got up and walked
away. I've never shot a gun before, but if I had one they would be the first
people I try it on. We finally had a few moments to relax when they started a
hairy chest contest on the deck below. I'm not bragging, but I would put some
animals in the zoo to shame with my chest hair. So we thought we would get a
good laugh and watch some guys make a fool out of themselves, right at that
point these little brats decided that the best place to watch was right in
front of us. I mean one of the kids was practically standing on my chair. I was
holding back from taking the little punk and tossing him overboard. I had
convinced myself that I would be making the future a better place by getting
rid of one brat, and any kid who acted like this I would get a thank you from
his parents. But, I resisted and the kids finally moved on. We spent the rest
of the day moving around the boat, looking for solitude. The evening did end up
great when we found a big lounge chair for two and watched the sun set. Over
all it was a good day.
Please read more about our adventure and the food we ate on
the boat at www.gabbin-bout-grub.blogspot.com