Work-Cat

(click image to enlarge) I thought I post an old idea I had called "Disgruntled Employee". There was a time that I worked for Satan's assistant manager. He was one of those bosses that knew nothing about the product, but thought he knew everything about everything. He also broke all 10 Bible commandments, plus some in other religions. This was not a nice guy to work for. I never could tell him what I really thought of him, I enjoyed eating and living with a roof over my head too much. So I started doodling these at work to let go of some steam. I did end up finding a new job and that company went under. Last I heard this guy was in jail for embezzlement.

Romans 12:19 - Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, "I will take revenge; I will pay them back," says the Lord.

On another note, my wife and I had a good laugh at the cat last night. He discovered the cursor moving around on the monitor and thought he could catch it. When he failed at that he used his mighty hunting skills and caught a bug that was flying around. The best part for me was watching my wife get grossed out when he was done playing and decided the bug would make a nice evening snack.

Cat, mans best friend?

My cat has it pretty easy. He gets to lounge around all day and has plenty of food. If he wants attention he just jumps in my lap, even if I want him to or not. He pretty much does as he pleases. He might come to me if I call him, but it normally takes a bribe like a treat or opening a can of food. I think my cat has this figured out and waits to come to me until he sees the bribe, then determines if it is worth it or not. He really has a stress free life.

Speaking of stress, A doctor recently told me I have to watch my high blood pressure. He told me to try and eat better and exercise more. Which for me, means to actually start exercising. He also said to eliminate anything stressful. I had to buy a blood pressure machine to track it. If it doesn't go down I may have to take a pill to control it. Now my life is pretty much like my cats. I sit around all day at my desk; I get plenty of food (maybe a little too much), and if I want attention I just I just find my wife. So either my doctor is wrong or my cat has some really high blood pressure.

Best Behavior

 Being married has been fun. You discover a lot about a person and how different their habits are from yours. When your dating, especially at the beginning, you are on your best behavior. You remember to brush your teeth and put on deodorant everyday. For guys their clothes become a little less wrinkled and cars are always clean on the inside. Women might shave their legs more often when they are dating someone. The same thing happens when you get married. For the first few months you make sure you brush your teeth every night before bed. But then, after a few more months you know your spouse wants to get lucky if they make a point to show you that they cleaned their teeth that evening. My advice from my mother before I got married was to be sure to pick up after myself, don't leave my dirty underwear laying on the floor for my wife to pick up. That lasted about 2 weeks. Hey, I could make a Olympic sport of taking my boxers off by kicking them in the air off my foot and catching them behind my back. But no one is perfect, and I miss every now and then, and they land on the floor. I wouldn't want to take away my wife's satisfaction and joy of knowing she's keeping our house tidy and pick them up myself. In regards to bowel movements of a gaseous nature. It was rough in the begging to hold back. I mean you don't want to be rude or scare the person you are falling in love with. But after about 1 month of marriage you end up chasing her around the house asking her to pull your finger, or the famous holding their heads under the covers.

The stink

Just had a nice 4 day vacation with my wife. WE stayed at home and didn't really do anything but lay around our pool. Very nice and relaxing, unfortunately for my wife, she didn't get to vacation from the household chores. Like the laundry and cleaning. She wouldn't let me help. She said I shouldn't be on vacation from my office and be working around the house. She's really great that way. But it also reminded me that since being married for almost 2 years, I haven't touched the washing machine or had to clean a bathroom. Of course when I was single I didn't clean the bathroom that much anyways. Only when I thought I was getting company, the smell got to be too much for me, or I started getting complaints from my neighbors.

Fake out

I am so glad I am married and out of the dating world. Guys will do just about anything to impress a girl that they like. We will make total fools of ourselves if we think it will get the ladies attention. I once hurt myself helping someone move by lifting more than I should have, all to show off for some girl that was there. Where did it get me? I ended up laying around for a week with a ice pack near a very sensitive man area, and I never heard from the girl again after the move. I personally believe women know this about men and use it to their total advantage. I think it is taught to girls at a young age during those health classes when they separate them from the boys and go into a different room.